Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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