My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
whose parrot is this?
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
