i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Randomize
