I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
