I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
