Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
