Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Is it because I queefed?
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Randomize
