So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
