So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
