??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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