Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Randomize
