i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Randomize
