oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
