love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize
