All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
