I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Randomize
