do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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