North Korea, Best Korea!
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
