I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
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