He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Randomize
