...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize