I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
