how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
