But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
