whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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