There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
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