I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
