So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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