"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize
