You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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