I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
