But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
