I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize