yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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