fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
