I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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