i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
well most of my day revolves around power hour
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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