Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Randomize
