wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I'm both gender and math confused
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
