I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
