If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Randomize
