I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
