wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Randomize
