This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
