So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
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