Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
