So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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