A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
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