so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Randomize
