they need to just BURY HIM!
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
My pussy is not your playground.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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