They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
